“Are you sure you’re in labour?” James asked Myrtle as she was being helped onto a wheel chair.
“The midwife at Rufus and August’s wedding was pretty adamant about it,” said Myrtle, gasping as another contraction took hold.
“She’s in labour,” the nurse insisted.
“James, we need you now!” a voice shouted from the other end of the corridor.
“It’s all right,” said Myrtle. “You’d better go.”
“I’ll be with you as soon as I can,” said James, dashing off.
“Do you want to call anyone else?” asked the nurse. “I wouldn’t want to think of you going into labour without someone to support you.”
“I’m just trying of think of who to ring,” sighed Myrtle.
“Your Mother,” suggested the nurse, pressing the lift button. Myrtle nearly fell out of the chair laughing.
“Sorry,” said Myrtle trying to get herself together. “I think my Mother would be the last person I’d want just now. She never has been much use with mess and she has zero tolerance on pain.”
“Do you mean she’s very sensitive?” asked the nurse.
“No, pretty much the opposite, if she doesn’t feel the pain, then it doesn’t exist,” said Myrtle.
“Do you have any siblings?” asked the nurse, pushing her into the lift.
“Not as far as I know,” said Myrtle. “But I do have some half siblings. I’ll ring their Mother, she might help.”
“Velvet,” said Myrtle gasping as another contraction came.
“Are you OK Myrtle?” Velvet asked. “You sound a bit out of breath.”
“I was wondering if you could help,” Myrtle gasped. “James has a bit on an emergency going on and I don’t think Mum would be any use, well, none at all. The nurse suggested I should have someone here to support me.”
“Have you gone into labour?” asked Velvet.
“Yes,” said Myrtle.
“I’ll be there in ten minutes, unless you can wand me over,” said Velvet.
“I can do that,” said Myrtle, giving her wand a quick flick.
“Shame you can’t do that with the baby,” said the nurse as she pushed the wheel chair out of the lift.
“I hope you don’t mind,” said Myrtle.
“Of course I don’t mind, it was nice of you to ask,” said Velvet, sending a quick text out to tell everyone where she was and not to disturb her unless the laundry burnt down.
“I couldn’t think of anyone better to be with me, well apart from James,” said Myrtle.
“Doctors aren’t that good at being the support person at times like this,” said the nurse. “Not in my experience anyway,” she added, pushing the wheel chair into the delivery ward.
“Room 7 is free,” said the nurse on reception.
“Could you get a midwife in,” said the nurse. “I should get back to my duties.”
“Of course,” said the nurse on reception.
“If you two wait there,” said the nurse whilst she rang for the midwife.
“Hello,” she said. “Myrtle has come in.”
“Is she in labour?” asked the voice on the other end of the phone.
“Looks like she is to me,” said the nurse. “I don’t think she’d be here if she wasn’t.”
“I’’ll be there in two ticks,” said the mid wife. “I really didn’t think she’d go through with this.”
“I don’t think any one else did,” said the nurse smiling.
Two minutes later Myrtle was being wheeled into the delivery room followed by a rather nervous Velvet and a couple of mid wives.
“Hello Enid,” her ex-husband said when she answered her phone. “How are things going.”
“Pretty boring really, I thought there might be a punch up between King Rufus and King Augustus, but they are both being very polite, even with the speeches,” said Enid. “Why have you rung?”
“Our daughter, Myrtle?” he asked.
“She left after the wedding,” said Enid. “No staying power.”
“Did you know that she was in labour?” he asked.
“There was a mid wife here saying something about it,” said Enid. “But the baby isn’t due for a month, so I don’t think she knew what she was talking about. Myrtle decided to go and see James just to be on the safe side. Personally I think she was making a mountain out of a mole hill, but then no one listens to me.”
“I think it’s more you don’t listen to anyone,” he shouted.
“Why have you rung me?” asked Enid.
“Our daughter is in labour, her husband is busy with an emergency and she rang Velvet as someone to support her whilst she gives birth to our grandchild,” he shouted.
“Couldn’t think of a better person to have at a time like that,” said Enid. “Our daughter is very intelligent,” she added. “Give me a ring when the baby is born,” she said and hung up.
“Was that your daughter?” asked the mid wife.
“No, it was her Father,” said Enid. “Sounds like you were right about her being in labour.”
“Don’t you want to be with her?” asked the mid wife, looking rather puzzled.
“She has her Father’s second wife with her,” said Enid. “She’s much better at this sort of thing.”
“And you’re happy with that?” asked the mid wife.
“It’s what my daughter wanted,” said Enid, picking up another glass of wine from the tray of a passing waiter and turned to find that the mid wife had walked off.
“Well, that’s got rid of her,” she thought, mingling with the other guests. “Myrtle’ll want to know all the details,” she told herself.
The birth was relatively quick and easy, so Myrtle had been cleaned up ready to go onto the ward with all the other Mums and their babies when James finally got to the delivery room.
“I was wondering when you’d turn up,” said the mid wife rather sharply.
“There was an emergency,” said James to the mid wife. “But I’m here now,” he added to Myrtle.
“There is always an emergency,” hissed the mid wife. “Someone else could have seen to that.”
“Would you like to meet your beautiful twins,” said Velvet.
“Twins! You didn’t predict that,” James said to the mid wife.
“As you know, it is easy to miss a multiple birth,” said the mid wife. “As you are here, you can push your wife to the ward.”
“That would be nice,” said Myrtle smiling.
“Shall I push the babies?” asked Velvet.
“I’ll get a nurse to give you a hand,” said the mid wife waving to one of her colleagues and watching as another woman, obviously in labour came into the ward.
“I’ll see you later,” the mid wife said to Myrtle. “I’ll come round to make sure you are settled.”
“Thank-you,” smiled Myrtle.
“I’m so sorry I wasn’t with you,” said James. “I meant to be, honestly.”
“It’s OK, I had Velvet,” said Myrtle.
“How come Enid didn’t come back with you?” James asked.
“She thought it was just wind,” sighed Myrtle.
“You could have rung her when you knew it wasn’t,” James persisted.
“Why? She’s the last person in the world I’d want in the delivery room with me,” said Myrtle.
“But, she’s your Mother!” said James.
“I know and I love her for what she is,” said Myrtle. “But I know what she’s like when it comes to pain, she thinks other people shouldn’t make such a fuss about it.”
“I should have been there,” said James.
“I had Velvet,” said Myrtle. “Now she is the person to have in a delivery room.”
“I was glad to help,” said Velvet. “It feels like I’m a Granny now.”
“You are,” said Myrtle. “You are Granny V,” she smiled.
“Thank-you,” sighed Velvet. “I’d better leave you alone to introduce your twins and I’ll ring your Dad with the good news.”
“I suppose I’d better ring Mum,” said Myrtle looking for her phone.
“Mum,” Myrtle said as soon as Enid answered.
“Hello,” said Enid. “Can’t say you’ve missed much, it’s all been very civilised.”
“You were right when you said it was twins,” said Myrtle.
“What do you mean?” asked Enid.
“You have two beautiful grandchildren, one girl and one boy,” said Myrtle looking proudly at the two babies.
“I had meant to ask,” said James looking from one to the other. “Which is which?”
“The baby girl is wrapped in a pink blanket and the boy in the blue one,” said Myrtle.
“You’ve given birth?” asked Enid.
“Yes, we’ve just got to the ward,” said Myrtle.
“I’ll let you get settled in and come round tomorrow,” said Enid hanging up.
“Is she coming?” asked James.
“Tomorrow, sometime,” sighed Myrtle.
“Sorry,” said James.
“It’s OK, I’m used to it,” said Myrtle looking at the babies.
“I’d better let you get some rest,” said James.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Myrtle yawned.
“Just you and me,” she whispered to the two babies.
“Now, be good for Mummy and let her get some sleep,” said the mid wife.
By Janice Nye © 2021
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